oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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