Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I just googled if crying burns calories
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize