Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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