FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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