And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
