i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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