He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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