I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
