hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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