In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Randomize
