Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
