he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Randomize
