wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize