I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
