I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
