quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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