Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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