its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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