exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Randomize
