Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
