There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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