girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
