We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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