billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
