"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize