Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
