How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
