4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Fuck appropriateness.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
