Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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