Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
