wat bout pragnant strippers??
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Randomize
