fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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