Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Randomize
