I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
