You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
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