My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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