so explain again why im purple
no
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
