Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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