Betty ford says i'm here all night
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
