I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
