Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
