So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
