Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Drake has all the answers
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize