I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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