What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
