Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
