I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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