i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just blew my weed a kiss
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
