Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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