you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize